"Oh say can you see, by the TV's blue light..."

Yes, it's true! Ninja Tuna is back!

After you read this post, you will have noticed that this post is not about food. The co-op blogging relationship between Ninja Tuna and the Asian-who-must-not-be-named Secret Asian has evolved from food level to hypothetical character level.

As you live life (life meaning watching movies all day, eating, and then sleeping), you will inevitably think about what kind of character you might play in a movie. "Would my character be able to jump off a skyscraper? What if my car was a transformer?" Admit it, it has crossed your mind before.

But then the other side of the mind starts speaking to you. "You apocalyptic dingleberry, why would YOU be in a movie?" That's when you stop daydreaming, turn off the TV, and then go to sleep.

As an avid follower of this blog, you should know that Ninja Tuna and Secret Asian don't like the other side of the mind barging in on imagination. That's just plain rude. This dislike for the other side ended up with both of them firing the other side of the mind from their duties, and spawned an intense discussion about what the other would be if they were in a movie.

Possible characteristics that Ninja Tuna thought Secret Asian would have as a hypothetical movie character:

• Motivated
• Persuasive
• Secretly secret
• Ninja
• Language and culinary skills

All this would come together and create...  A superb professional chef (best in the world) who attempts to convince U.S. and international politicians to pass laws banning rice in burritos. Anyone who stands in her way will feel her wrath because she ninja-stylishly will sneak inside people's homes and poison their morning cereals with her super secret spicy sauce.

Now, Secret Asian believes she should be a super-villain in the likes of Bellatrix Lestrange. The character would fit her personality, but Bellatrix can't cook. Bellatrix probably has no clue what a burrito is, let alone a rice-less burrito. So the verdict is this: Secret Asian, unfortunately, cannot be a Bellatrix Lestrange. Not enough frizzy hair, black clothes, white skin, scary stick, bulging eyes, and... black clothes.

Alas, all this is hypothetical, and no matter how much people wish they could be the movie characters they imagine themselves to be, it is not their fate.

"There is no fate but what we make."

-Sarah Connor, Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles

For another hypothetical angle on the hypotheses of hypothetical movie characters, visit Secret Asian's blog and look for her hypothetical post on hypotheses about hypothetical movie characters. (This really makes no sense at all.)

http://asianslikerice.blogspot.com/